Tuesday, November 06, 2007

      ( 12:03 AM ) teahouse
Brace Face!!

My dentist recently sent me to see an orthodontist, since my teeth have been moving a lot lately.

I had really bad teeth as a kid. I had to get the works - braces, a bite plate, headgear, rubber bands.

This was in 1987. My parents spent over $3,000 on my braces and other paraphernalia. Extrapolated to today's dollars, that's like the equivalent of a kid's private college tuition.

For three years, my head was in what amounted to a full skull sling. The leather straps gave me permanent headgear hair. I could barely talk, and often drooled. I was hideous, pimply and scary.

After all of that came off, I was in high school, and blossomed into a lovely young woman, blah blah blah.

Anyway, fast forward 20 years. This new orthodontist has told me that due to an inherent jaw problem, it will be necessary for me to get braces again. It's not just a cosmetic thing; it's to prevent the front teeth from falling out of the skull. The total cost will be around $10,000.

The Fiance and I have discussed it, and agreed that it will be our first major expense post-wedding.

I can just see it now.

"Sorry kid..we can't send you to nursery school because we're fixing Mommy's jaw. Yes, your education is important, but so is Mommy's ability to open her mouth, right?"

"We have to live in New Jersey because we can't afford a down payment on a place in Manhattan. With dental bills for your mother being what they are."

"Smoothies for dinner, everyone! Mommy just got her braces tightened! Who wants to help her put in her rubber bands tonight?"

I feel very glum about the whole thing.



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THIRTYSOMETHING (!!) year old Asian American New Yorker, lawyer, amateur musician, curious girl taking a bite out of the Big Apple. Don't mess with me - I'm short and I look demure, but I carry a big purse. And I've just embarked on the journey of married life in Manhattan.

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